The importance of romantic poetry

Just like the Super Bowl, Christmas, and any other commercial holiday, I awoke today with little knowledge of its significance. Of course, it's Valentine's Day. In Japan, on Valentine's women deliver chocolates to the men in their lives. This empowers women to confess their feelings, or confirm their relationships with men. Meanwhile, men are expected to give gifts to the women in their lives on White Day. Valentine's marks the beginning of a romantic gift exchange.

Here, of course, there is no exchange. Men are expected to buy flowers, chocolate, cards, and jewelry in an attempt to stake claim to a person who may enjoy material things more than partnership. As someone who would rather give a partner plants instead of flowers – because flowers die – Valentine's is nothing more than a reason for a woman to shout at me. I'm not going to be part of a one-way-corporate robbery under the guise of romance.

That doesn't mean that I don't like romantic poetry, to the contrary, I believe romantic poetry is an important part of a writer's personal cannon. I've heard people call poems about love cliche, but that couldn't be further from the truth.

In every medium of art, there are standards. For instance, if I wanted to know how talented a group of visual artists were, I could ask them to sketch a bowl of fruit. Jazz singers could be assessed through the American songbook. For chefs, ask them to cook eggs. Every art has a subject, theme or work that makes comparison easier. If you want to figure out who's the most talented poet, ask them to write a poem about love.

A poet cannot hide behind love. Often, poets build careers writing work on certain themes. It could be their religion, their stance on civil rights, tragedy, etc. By doing this, they can mask the quality of their writing. If I can make the best jerk chicken, but can't make soft-boiled eggs, it means that I lack something in the foundation of my cooking. Likewise, if I can write publishable works of poetry, but can't write a decent love poem, there's something missing in the foundation of my writing.

This makes writing love poetry the most difficult type of poetry to write. Often, when I go out with a woman, she assumes because we're going out I'm going to write tons of poetry about her. It couldn't be further from the truth.

There are a number of pits and pratfalls when writing romantic poetry. Too often, poets confuse, love and/or romance with sex. Poets use turns of phrase that are overused. Don't get me wrong, I'm all about intentionally using cliche, but there's a difference between using them with intent and grasping at straws to create a poem. However, if you can avoid the standard tropes of romantic poetry, you can create a work that has an emotional impact on a wide audience.

My advice to others is to keep it simple. I'll look for a small moment that I shared with someone else. It could appear insignificant, but if it left a memory in my mind, then it's ideal to build a poem. That conversation, short glance, caring hug, or a kind note could inspire a poem. From there, I'll mind map everything that I can remember: smells, sights, sounds. For me, it's easier to elevate a moment, than to explain a romantic feeling. By elevating that moment and placing my subject in it, in a positive light, a simple moment becomes a romantic one.

I would start the poem with the smallest detail and then expound on the moment. You don't have to say “I love you,” but don't be afraid to say the word love. However, it's not necessary. Writing something that tells someone that you see the beauty in the trivial things they do is more than enough. Other readers will feel the poem because they share some of those traits, care about someone who fits those characteristics, or can appreciate the detail in your perception of someone you care about.

The rest is up to you. Your ability to turn a phrase, and weave words. Show us your talent. Write a romantic poem.