Writer in Residence

In good company

By Dietrich Kalteis

So, you finished your novel and sent it off anticipating it’s publication. Bravo! If you get a “No thanks, this isn’t for us” note, then consider yourself in good company. Many an author’s literary heroes have also had their greatness denied.

James Lee Burke’s The Lost Get-Back Boogie was rejected over 100 times before it was published. Elmore Leonard’s The Big Bounce did bounce, 84 times, then went on to be made into a movie — twice. And to Think that I Saw It on Mulberry Street by Dr. Seuss was sent back 27 times. William Golding’s Lord of the Flies got 21 rejections, and Catch-22 by Joseph Heller received … you guessed it, 22.

Little, Brown & Company passed on a two-book deal for Alice Walker. When complete The Color Purple sold 10 million copies and won a Pulitzer Prize.

“I would advise anyone who aspires to a writing career that before developing his talent, he would be wise to develop a thick hyde.” — Harper Lee

“I finished my first book seventy-six years ago. I offered it to every publisher on the English-speaking earth I had ever heard of. Their refusals were unanimous: and it did not get into print until, fifty years later; publishers would publish anything that had my name on it.” — George Bernard Shaw

Imagine being told this about your work:

“… you just don’t know how to use the English language.” — San Francisco Examiner regarding a submission by Rudyard Kipling.

"You’d have a decent book if you’d get rid of that Gatsby character." — A revision suggested to F. Scott Fitzgerald.

“Nobody will want to read a book about a seagull.” — Richard Bach’s Jonathan Livingston Seagull went on to sell 44 million copies.

“Too radical of a departure from traditional juvenile literature.” — L. Frank Baum’s The Wonderful Wizard of Oz sold 15 million copies.

Some writer friends of mine have also felt the sting:

“I wrote a story with a scene told by a man, as a prison guard and a priest walk him to the death chamber. I sent it to Ellery Queen and they liked it, but rejected it because the main character needed to have someone respond to him in some way. I added a sentence of description and a line of dialogue for the guard and sent the story to Alfred Hitchcock (sister publication to Ellery Queen). They also liked the story, but they too rejected it because the business with the guard was superfluous.” — Dana King, author of the Nick Forte and Penns River series

“I decided to study my MFA, wanting to do something for my writing, so I applied to Harvard. I passed the exam, but my credentials weren’t up to par. I have a three year Bachelor of Arts in English and Philosophy from the University of The Witwatersrand. An author friend suggested I try the University of British Columbia because Canada might be more kind. Canada was not! While Harvard sent me emails ‘Hi Lisa, greetings!’ UBC told me that they were doing me a favour by answering my email, my credentials were worthless, and that I would not be ‘competitive’. The tone sounded quite personal and I felt gutted. I haven’t given up on my MFA yet, but I need to recover a bit before I try elsewhere.” — Lisa de Nikolits, author of The Occult Persuasion and Rotten Peaches

“I wrote my first novel (which never should have been submitted) and sent it to any publisher accepting un-agented submissions. One of those was SOHO Press. I sent my novel along with my praise for what they did. They sent back the most gloriously snarky rejection letter that I totally deserved. I didn't realize they only publish international set or international authors. They thanked me for my praise but pointed out that if I were really a fan, I'd know that they only published stuff set outside the U.S. — my book was set in the midwest. I was embarrassed, shamed, and it slapped me straight not to send a manuscript willy-nilly out into the world.” — Eric Beetner, author of All the Way Down and Rumrunners

“There was this one rejection that sticks in the mind . . . My first book came back from an agent with the note "I don't like this but I quite like you. Show me the next thing you finish.” I was mightily affronted, until I had it pointed out to me that ‘I liked this a lot but you seem dreadful’ would have been worse.” — Catriona McPherson, author of the Dandy Gilver and Lexy Campbell series

Bad reviews. Yup, they happen. There are the good ones, but every once in a while …

“There are two equally serious reasons why it isn’t worth any adult reader’s attention. The first is that it is dull, dull, dull in a pretentious, florid and archly fatuous fashion. The second is that it is repulsive.” — The New York Times, on Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov

“It is no discredit to Walt Whitman that he wrote Leaves of Grass, only that he did not burn it afterwards.” – The Atlantic

“It is numbingly boring, and for much of the time deeply and extremely disgusting. Not interesting-disgusting, but disgusting-disgusting: sickening, cheaply sensationalist, pointless except as a way of earning its author some money and notoriety.” — The Observer, on American Psycho by Brett Easton Ellis

“Miss Lee’s problem has been to tell the story she wants to tell and yet to stay within the consciousness of a child, and she hasn't consistently solved it.” — The Saturday Review, on To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee

“The writing of The Handmaid's Tale is undistinguished ... This is a serious defect, unpardonable maybe for the genre: a future that has no language invented for it lacks a personality. That must be why, collectively, it is powerless to scare.” — The New York Times, on The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood

Keeping it in perspective …

“NOBODY KNOWS ANYTHING. Not one person knows for a certainty what’s going to work. Do not let “no” stop you. Keep going!” — William Goldman

So, that wraps up my stay here. I want to thank Open-Book again for letting me sit in as writer in residence for the month. I’ve had a great time.

Dietrich

The views expressed in the Writer-in-Residence blogs are those held by the authors and do not necessarily reflect the views of Open Book.


Dietrich Kalteis is the award-winning author of Ride the Lightning (bronze medal winner, 2015 Independent Publisher Book Awards, for best regional fiction), The Deadbeat Club, Triggerfish, House of Blazes (silver medal winner, 2017 Independent Publisher Book Awards, for best historical fiction), Zero Avenue, Poughkeepsie Shuffle, and Call Down the Thunder. His novel The Deadbeat Club has been translated to German, entitled Shootout, and 50 of his short stories have also been published internationally. Cradle of the Deep is his eighth published work. He lives with his family on Canada’s West Coast.

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